I wanted to talk about something that has been coming up recently in many of my consultations lately. The issue I have been seeing is parents feeling guilty about how they got to the sleep situation they are in. They tell me if they had only done something different in the past, maybe they would not need my help. Or they say that if they were a better parent, their child would be sleeping.
You did what you had to do to survive – if you rocked your child, slept with your child, fed them all night, whatever you did, you did it because you felt you needed to at the time. Or you wanted to do it at the time and now it is not working out as well as you wanted it to. It has nothing to do with being a bad parent. You did it for the love of your child. You did not want to hear them cry or you needed to get sleep so that you could be a decent parent to them. Maybe you did not know there was anything you could do. Maybe you thought you just had to deal with all the night waking because the only other choice was to let your baby cry all by themselves.
But, here’s the thing – now you know me and I can help you change any of those behaviors you want to change. If there is something you do not want to change, that is fine too! (Read my blog post called Am I Ready to Sleep Train My Child if you are unsure whether you want to change) Almost everything can be undone. And if you do not want to change now, that is okay too! You love your child and you know what is best for your child. That does not mean sometimes you do not need some help in how to get to the place you want to be at, but no one should be telling you to do something that does not feel right to you and your parenting style.
If you feel you want to make a change with your child’s sleep habits, feel free to contact me for a free 15 minute consultation so you can see what I can offer to you. If you are not ready now, that is perfectly fine, you can come back when you are ready. And just remember, you are doing what you are doing for the love of your child, no one should make you feel guilty for that (even yourself!)
By the way, this applies to every aspect of parenting, not just sleep.
by Michelle Winters
SleepWell Sleep Solutions